[johngriffen]

I see the ladies are on a roll...
Just a few before I'm off for dinner
SORRY PJ

So, it's 8:43 PM on December 18 and 33F/1C here with no snow on the ground. I'll take it.

[FreezeMe]

So, it's 8:43 PM on December 18 and 33F/1C here with no snow on the ground. I'll take it.

It's 4:00AM on December 19th and 26.6/-3C here with a lot of snow xD

[matina]

it is 249pm on a Wednesday afternoon 19th December it is 33 degrees C and 54% humidity with a 26km easterly hot wind (not happy at all)

[FreezeMe]

it is 249pm on a Wednesday afternoon 19th December it is 33 degrees C and 54% humidity with a 26km easterly hot wind (not happy at all)

Sorry to hear that Hopefully it'll get colder in January...

[Alessa9]

I hope summer ends soon for you, matina. We’re just getting cooler weather now. It’s cool but sunny @ 25C right now. It’ll drop to 16C by nightfall.

Thanks for the kilt porn, JG!

[johngriffen]

It's staying above freezing here, so we are a little warmer than would be expected this time of year.
And by the looks of things, we may NOT have a white Christmas.
Now, I'm not a big fan of snow... but, I do like to have an inch or two of snow on the ground for Christmas.
A "light" snowfall on Christmas Eve is what I consider PERFECT!

Alessa9
It just seemed like some more Kilt Porn was required

So hello to all the regulars, lurkers, newbies that have stuck around and potential newbies

[serenityzero]

Hi all,

I'm still around. I'm sorry for basically fleeing into the night after appealing to you all for help. It affected me a lot more than I expected to just admit to the world in general that I'm a mess and I hate myself and I just want to give up. It's heavy to deal with. Does anyone else get depressed around Christmas or is it just me?

@johngriffen ,
Thank you for your reply. I've been finding it confusing when to be up front with people and when to try to “pass.” I was up front with work and now it's a legal battle. I'm up front with people, but my mom has criticized me for it. Sometimes I feel like I'm “playing a card” or using ASD as a shield or an excuse, even though I would tell anyone else that that's absurd. I judge myself more harshly than anyone else (I assume most people do). I guess as far as friends and stuff go, I just don't know how to FIND people when I don't/can't really go anywhere. I'm basically housebound right now unless someone is with me, and I really don't know when or if I'll be able to go back to being a somewhat functional person. I understand intellectually that I'm just at a nadir in my life, but the future feels so hopeless, you know? I feel like who would ever want to be my friend, let alone what kind of guy would want me as an SO. No one, is how I feel. I can't meet anyone, I can't get people to like me, and I can't keep them around. I feel like I have nothing to offer anyone in exchange for everything I ask FROM them. I guess I feel more bleak about myself than about other people. I appreciate your taking the time to share your experiences, and your encouragement. It means a lot to me.

@Stretton,
Thanks for you reply and for the advice. I'm sorry it took so long to get back to you. I've been in the mental health system for over a decade. Unfortunately the medications and stuff that are out there are more of an art than a science when it comes to matching someone's specific brain to the right medications. I'm classified as “treatment-resistant” right now, and I'm hesitant to mess with them given the whole process, you know? We're kind of stuck waiting for science to get some better tools. But I'm glad to see another Canadian, eh? Thank you very much for taking the time to speak with me. I appreciate your support, advice, and concern.

@Matina,
Thank you for thinking of me. I've been thinking about joining some kind of group but right now my capacity for social interaction is really limited. Case in point: this long overdue reply. Regretfully, however, I will not be able to supply salad or vegetables for the party, as I am unfamiliar with both concepts. I fed these “veggie-tables” to my guinea pig but I think she was over-hyping them and I was never suckered in by her enthusiasm. Do you require any extra social anxiety at this event? I've been looking to re-gift some of mine. If not, I can offer a picture of my guinea pig or perhaps...just...all of cookies? Like...ALL of the cookies?

Please let me know,
SZ

[matina]

@ SZ anything you bring or dont bring to the party is alright with me just your turning up is the point and case and the real victory.
Yes i get anxious too i have to deal with Satan (my father) at Christmas so i know how unenthusiastic Christmas can be not to mention some of the unappreciative relatives (we all have them) especially when they have no concept of disabling medical issues. I have psoroatic arthritis which is now advancing and is literally eating me up alive my own immune system is attacking me hence my feet have arthritis and swell up and hot too so my mobility is limited and hence make me feel depressed too. I just got the results of recent blood tests and my rheumatologist has recommended i start a drug called methotrexate which is used for cancer patients admittedly she said it is a very low dose compared to the cancer fighting potency but side effects will be the same nausea and headaches (yeah like i could do with more of that in my life I told her i will think about it so come the new year i guess if i want to live and not try to skin myself alive in the process i will have to try it and see.
However it doesn't stop the peanut gallery of so called friends and family that just think your lazy you should just pull your finger out of ones own ass and not try to use it as an excuse they dont get it because they dont live it so i can fully appreciate your situation
i guess we all have our crosses to bear in this life , but some who have perfect lives and have healthy bodies and minds just cant even begin to be sympathetic let alone empathetic to someones issues and limitations. however those same folks if something goes wrong act like drama queens like the world has come to an end and everyone MUST pay attention and cater to their every whim and need. funny how that is when it is their ass in the line of fire
so please feel free to vent chat have a laugh here we all have issues some more than others and we certainly dont judge if they do let me know i am famous for GROWLING & BITING TOO
Let us all pray Christmas comes and goes without incident or bloodshed kathy is my bail fund stocked up??? in case Satan has an accident
well time i said goodnight to all the regulars PJ i hope your ok?
stretton ada JG love the kilt porn snow porn is next please
SZ nice to see you here please stick around the more the merrier and the nuttier we will all be now thats a party arrwhoooo!!!

[johngriffen]

serenityzero
Welcome back.
First, the people I know that get depressed at the holidays are either "alone" or have had bad experiences in the past during the holidays
SO NO! It's not JUST YOU... Many, MANY people suffer from depression this time of year.

Second, I hear you, LIFE SUCKS! And you have a damn good reason for feeling like that. You've been dealt some tough cards to play.
But, no matter what, You can't give up.
And for that to happen, you have to have HOPE that things not only can get better, but WILL GET BETTER!
If you have no hope, it is impossible to get into a better situation.

Third, BABY STEPS!
Take things slow and easy. You say you are housebound unless somebody is with you... TOTALLY UNDERSTANDABLE!
So, tomorrow, walk to the corner and back. Don't talk to anybody, but do take in the view... try to enjoy being outside. Look at the buildings, the trees, whatever...
When this starts feeling comfortable, go shopping. Go to a nearby store and buy "something"... doesn't have to be big or important, heck even a bottle of water will do.
You will have to interact with the cashier, but it will be very limited, and you may not even have to say anything, but it will be a form of human contact.
Go to a park, and sit on a bench watching people... heck, feed the birds. Stay as long as you are comfortable, then head home.
If you do this on a regular basis and consistent basis, you may even get lucky and somebody will notice you and try to start a conversation. And the best part is, they will be the one that is probably more uncomfortable since they think they are the ones taking the chance... (NORMAL WARNING TO BE AWARE OF SICKOS or OTHER CREEPY PEOPLE)

While you are working on being out of your safe zone, work on your personal skills as well
GO ON LINE!
Look for chat rooms or forums (like mobilism ) where you can interact with people safely behind your computer screen.
One big advantage is that you can take your time responding and actually thinking about what you are going to say. This is much better than being put on the spot in real life and feeling uncomfortable because you don't quickly know what to say or do.
Find sites on topics that really interest you... who knows, you might meet somebody with similar interests and passions. I met my buddy at a Strategic War Gaming Club. The shared passion, interest and respect was helped me and him get past our issues. He was a good war gamer, and people respected that about him. We kind of adopted him into our little band of friends... and god help anybody that tried to give him ****!
I don't want to make this sound easy... it isn't. But it really helps if you have a passion about something to find others that share that passion, either online, or eventually in real life.

But I'm getting a little too wordy and preachy here... Let me sum it up.
And matina would agree with me on this...

[pjmpjm]

Good night, everyone!

(Sun is just rising over my brother's house in Maine.)

Advance Merry Christmas Guys!

[johngriffen]

Good Morning/evening/whatever mFear

It's morning here in beautiful sunny Chicago
We are expected to have temps around 52 F here (11C)

For all you on this side of the world...
WAKE UP AND POST

I spent way too much time last night getting my lakka box back up and playing Final Fantasy VII on it.

[matina]

good morning all!
@ SZ yes JG put it perfectly the motto of the wolf is "NEVER GIVE UP NEVER SURRENDER!"
JG way to go nicely said i knew there was a reason i love you so much
PJ gorgeous pic of Maine ahhhh a girl can dream cant she?? love to Cosmo and the girls, how is Merlin these days?
kathy what are you up to today im busy getting prescriptions and a few things on my do do list, need to have my medic alert bracelet fixed it came apart last night yeah i know right just before xmas. i need to get a couple of keys cut. so busy beaver again today. feet are still swollen red like FUGU!
bear ice stretton bluey booktopia sherly star dreamy alessa diva nonny pinkworld pink magnolia camnus isak seb binaryhermit newbies. wishing you all a good day and a merry xmas too if we dont see you before then.